So I have a confession. A while back, I questioned the motives of a certain MEGACHURCH in the Lexington area. I even may have said something to the effect of:
"I'm pretty sure I am done with the whole MEGACHURCH thing...I mean...come on..."
" ....I'm sorry. This is too cynical, but perhaps a little true? Maybe. Jesus can and does work through these churches. I'm not saying He doesn't. I am saying that I don't think my place is there. That's just me."
Since then, I actually have been back to this church a few times. I question myself everytime I go. Am I going because it is like fastfood spirituality for the week or do I feel drawn by the Spirit to go there. Honestly, the first time was because I overslept and missed the church I wanted to go in the morning, but this week, I can say I truly felt called to go there.
Tonight the sermon was from Romans 12:1-2.
Romans 12 English Standard Version
A Living Sacrifice
1I appeal to you therefore, brothers,[a] by the mercies of God, to present your bodies as a living sacrifice, holy and acceptable to God, which is your spiritual worship.[b] 2Do not be conformed to this world,[c] but be transformed by the renewal of your mind, that by testing you may discern what is the will of God, what is good and acceptable and perfect.
So many times when I have read this scripture, I pass over "but be transformed by the renewal of your mind." But tonight, it stuck out to me.
Lately I have been wondering what the crap I am doing with my time here at Seminary. I am constantly feeling dumb because of all the intelligent people around me. I know I am capable of doing the work, but sometimes I feel inadequate in the presence of my peers. I also find myself completly frustrated by some people in my classes who seem to me, to be so arrogant that they feel they can call out a professor who has been teaching for his whole life, or an author who obviously has put hundreds of hours into work on a book. I am frustrated by a lack of humility on some my classmates parts when it comes to learning.
But I am more frustrated in myself. Am I allowing God to renew my mind here at school? I don't think I have been. So much of my Christian life has been lived at heart level and I think God is wanting to start working on my upstairs.
Just a thought.
peace out,
hersch
3 comments:
First off, I want to let you know that the same thoughts tend to run through my mind when I head to church sometimes. i go to a very wealthy--2-3000 member church, and almost every week, I struggle with the question of why I go there, rather than a more simple church, which doesn't have bmw's or hummers in its parking lot. I originally went because i was invited there my freshman year(a time when i was not following Christ) and God always seemed to tug at my heart when i went. As the years have gone by, i've tried to invest in it more and more because I know that God used the people at the church in my life. ..but still i really don't understand it sometimes.
i guess i always (don't know if it's right) come back to the idea that if i want to take the time to complain about a church building and the condition of the people meeting in it, I should take the time to invest in those people first and then see if God has really put me in a place to encourage, challenge and/or rebuke.
as far as renewal of the mind...I'm thankful i got to read that scripture posted on your blog. i've been on a wavelength that seems kind of similar and that verse was encouraging. so thanks!
p.s....finally posted...
right on man...
Good thoughts, man! I recently read one of those church signs I hate so much that said something to the effect of "reason is the enemy of faith." I wanted to spit in disgust. God gave us a mind for a reason!
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